Teenagers' Imaginary Audience
by
David C. Mathis, Ed.D.
Young children can often be fascinating to watch as they interact with their imaginary friends. We would likely think our teenager was disturbed if we saw him or her doing the same thing. However, all teenagers are prone to have an imaginary audience. They feel as though they have an audience watching every move. This imaginary audience is the outgrowth of what is referred to as egocentrism. Not selfishness but self-centeredness. Young children are self-centered in a way that they may be unconcerned with others watching their play. A teenager is self-centered in such a way to think that everyone is watching. They tend to see themselves as central in life and tend to believe that they are much more significant on the social stage of life than they really are.
Think about how this would affect teenagers.
Teenagers will fantasize about how others will react to their looks and actions. This is why teenagers discover mirrors. That child who in the past was unconcerned about looks is now preoccupied with having every hair being in place. There is a strong and sometimes sudden interest in clothes and "fashion." They go to great lengths to have everything together because they imagine that every eye will be on them as they walk into a crowded room. And imagine the horror of a facial blemish. Remember, they often feel that everyone is looking at and judging them. Even a slight blemish can make them wish they could be invisible as they enter a room.
This imaginary audience is a constant judge of their behavior. For some teenagers, concern about this audience in their head is so strong they make surprising changes in their behavior. They have to be "cool" and it can be very uncool, for example, to be seen with one's parents. And by all means, don't dare try to show affection to your teenage in public, especially around his or her friends. What would the imaginary audience think? Dress, speech, appearance, actions are all subject to judgment by their imaginary audience. With all this imaginary attention, no wonder that teenagers have so much to be worried about.
Research reveals that egocentrism peaks around the age of 13 years old. It may take several years for the imaginary audience to largely disappear so that the teenager can walk into a crowded room without feeling like everyone, much less anyone, cares about his or her dress and appearance. However, this stage of development will also pass. It may even be possible to hug that big kid in public again.